The demon picked me up by the throat. I gasped for breath and tried to free myself to no avail. I managed to utter “Go to hell!”
The demon smiled as he held the bloody dagger he had used to kill the provincial in his other hand. “Very well, priest.” The creature thrust the dagger deep into my side.
I felt the sharp sting of the blade as it ripped through my flesh. Then my side began to burn as the energy drained from my body. I felt the demon’s grip tighten around my neck. My vision blurred, then there was darkness.
Fr. Wayne let himself in. “Fr. Manuel wants to see you, Oliver.”
Oliver clutched his side, as he sprang up from his dream and looked at Fr. Wayne.
“Are you OK?”
Oliver wiped the sweat from his brow. “I’m fine. I must have dozed off, just a bad dream. I’ll be there in a few, just want to jump in the shower. I’m sweating like a pig.”
“Good idea,” replied Fr. Wayne. It stinks in here.
Oliver jumped in the shower and felt a sting as the cool water as it touched his scar. He felt the area and noticed the scar which was not there before his nap. It felt tender but was not bleeding. He examined it, almost four inches wide. It was the exact spot the demon had stabbed him during his nightmare. “How can this be? That was just a dream. I didn’t have this before.”
***
Oliver entered the provincial’s office. “Sit down, Oliver,” said Fr. Manuel, as he put a book on a bookcase and walked to take a seat behind his large mahogany desk.”
Oliver sat down and waited for him to take his seat.
As Fr. Manuel was about to sit, he froze, looked at Oliver with a blank expression, eyes opened wide.
Oliver darted up out of his chair.
Fr. Manuel waved his hand, motioning for Oliver to sit back down. “It’s this dammed heartburn. I get it every time I eat pepperoni pizza. It’ll pass in just a moment. I didn’t mean to scare you.” Fr. Manuel noticed Oliver’s pale skin color. “Are you all right, Oliver? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
Oliver sat back down. “No. It’s just that I thought you were in real trouble for a moment.”
Fr. Manuel took his seat. “I will be if I keep eating pepperoni pizza.”
“Fr. Wayne said you wanted to see me.”
“Yes, I know today was an important day for you and the church. I just want to see if there is anything you want to discuss. I’ve been there myself. There are occasions of buyer’s remorse among a few newly ordained priest. It is a reality of our calling. You come all the way, to this point, and decide it is not for you after all.” Fr. Manuel paused and studied Oliver. “Is that the case with you?”
Oliver took a deep breath and looked intently at Fr. Manuel. “No, that is not the case with me. This is where I need to be.”
“Are you sure, Oliver? This is not simply about the rest of your life but about the lives you will touch as an ordained priest. Let your truth come forth, whatever that may be. You are still one of God’s precious creations and have his unending love whether or not you follow through with your vows. Do not let human pride or fear stand in your way of acknowledging what you must do. If it sounds like I am trying to convince you to leave the priesthood on the day you became one, that is not the case. I just want what is best for you and the church.”
“I understand, Fr. Manuel. I assure you, I have no regrets or second thoughts about becoming a priest.”
“What happened this afternoon? Your comrades were worried about you, seeing spots and all. It sounds like a severe case of second thoughts to me, enough to make you physically ill. It started the minute you left the church, didn’t it?”